The Country of Surprise: New questions to ask

[ad#CCCS]
Understanding Unexpected Later Life Shifts

It’s one thing to talk about aging looking forward; quite another to view it from within that mature skin. In How Did I Get to Be 70 When I’m 35 Inside? 70-year-old Linda Douty offers a delightful “new paradigm” roadmap for conscious aging, focusing on the landscape of surprise in seven stages: Surprises of the Self, Body, Relationships, and the Sacred; to Surprising Challenges, Gifts, and Wisdom.

The more than fifty elders she interviewed pulled no punches, yet their honesty conveys humor and acceptance, even joy, as people embrace the freedom to finally express the totality of who they are, without apology or restraint.

Understanding Reverse Mortgage Clients

Since many reverse mortgage professionals may be closer to 35 than to 70, Douty’s book offers a useful peek inside your prospects’ minds.

I especially enjoyed her take on how, as we age, we tend to experience weight gain and memory loss — along with a shrewd way to ameliorate this change: “Our culture seems much more obsessed with what we feed our bodies than what we feed our minds. How many calories? How much fiber? But our minds take ‘bites’ from a huge buffet of offerings — violent movies, TV sitcoms, trashy novels, idle gossip — all junk food for the brain. To retain any measure of hope and optimism, we must become aware of our own complicity in this junk-food diet.”

Then there’s the difference between knowledge and wisdom. One senior gentleman told her with a grin, “Knowledge is knowing that a tomato is a fruit; wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.”

To open a deeper dialogue with your reverse mortgage prospects, consider adapting one or more of Douty’s inquiries. The seniors you meet with will likely be happily surprised that their reverse mortgage professional is taking such a dedicated interest in their lives. Douty’s questions include:

1. What has surprised you most about aging?
2. What have you discovered about yourself that you didn’t know before?
3. How would you complete the sentence, “I’ve always wanted to …”
4. What has been your greatest challenge in growing older?
5. Your greatest joy?
6. How old do you feel inside?

Sooner or later, if we’re fortunate enough, we’ll all become residents in the country of surprise. This is your invitation to visit, and return with wisdom gained.

Is Anybody Home? Focus In Client Relationships

Undivided attention

During a recent consultation with a coaching client the discussion turned to the topic of focus and how to stay on task when there are so many potential distractions in a given day. This got me thinking……

Having been a speaker as well as an attendee at many mortgage industry and senior related functions, I can’t help but notice how more and more, when the speaker is presenting, much of the audience is engaged in other activities. No this is not a commentary on the speaker himself, quite the contrary. It seems that we are all so concerned about staying connected 100% of the time, that we could miss a good presentation or discussion. When you are part of the audience, you have taken the time out of your day to attend a presentation- so really be there! You just may walk away with a nugget of marketing information that will help you build your pipeline. Put down the blackberry, the i-phone, the Droid, the (fill in other name of gadget here) and be there.

Client Focus

The same goes for the time you are spending with your senior clients. Personally, I love it when my clients tell me the story of their life. It often affords me great insight into how to best present the reverse mortgage and its benefits. I am not looking at my watch (or worse, my phone) while we are talking but rather devoting my full attention to them. I take notes and nod from time to time to show that I am paying attention. I ask leading questions to spur further conversation. Being 100% focused on the client during any interaction distinguishes you as a true professional, not just another loan officer. Try this in your day to day appointments, put down the phone and focus on what is taking place right there and then. You just might learn something!