Want A Grandchild? Rent One.

grandchildren reverse mortgage news aging

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Picture this: your elderly HECM client has always adored youngsters, but he and his dear wife, who married late in life for their era, never had children. So there are no grandchildren to spoil, either.

Or, perhaps they have grandchildren — who live far away, across the country or across the globe. Now his wife is gone, and he so wishes he had grandkids who could come visit.

Once upon an extended family, that might have meant inviting grandnieces and grandnephews over. Today, it means a senior without biological family (or even with them) can hire a vetted “grandchild” to spend time with.

Grandkids on Demand

The sharing economy has become the caring economy. It’s the newest and sweetest way to alleviate the loneliness endemic to an older population — and enable both generations to discover what the other has to share.

In fact, addressing elder loneliness is one of the key motivations that birthed the rent-a-grandchild app known as Papa. When his own grandfather was diagnosed with dementia, Papa founder Andrew Parker watched his grandmother struggle to care for him. His grandfather didn’t need home care per se; just someone to relieve his grandmother and spend quality time with his grandfather. Papa (the name comes from his family’s nickname for his grandfather) fills this service gap.

grandchildren reverse mortgage news agingPapa connects college students and seniors who’d like to spend time together. Whether the elder needs household help, transportation, tech tutoring, or simply some stimulating conversation, Papa matches them with a rigorously screened student eager to be of service to older adults.

Unlike traditional home care agencies, there is no weekly minimum or ongoing commitment; the senior controls when their “grandchild” comes to “visit”. They can even request a specific student repeatedly, which helps build a relationship.

This positive approach provides an enjoyable way for a HECM holder to age in place with comfort, care, and companionship. The service is also very affordable, and Medicare Advantage will (at last) begin covering home health assistance in 2019.

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Rent-to-own Relatives?

While “renting” a grandchild is still a step down from Japan’s innovative “family rental” business, where clients can rent wives, husbands and children who act the part of the missing family members, Papa does encourage its students to broaden seniors’ social interaction and help expand their skills, such as learning to use social media.

Services such as Papa can also be a precursor to cross-generational home sharing down the road.

And maybe, if your rental relatives (or actual ones) come for a longer visit, they can stay in your universal design-adapted tiny house. In this collaborative era, these two game-changing innovations might be an ideal match.

Our Mother’s Keeper: Part 1

A Resolution to Last All Year & Beyond

reverse mortgage newsWe all know how ephemeral New Year’s resolutions can be. With the best of intentions the first of January, you plan to join a health club, spend more time with your family, watch fewer ball games on the weekends… Whatever is on your checklist, chances are it’s relegated to the bottom of the to-do’s by February.

There’s one area that all reverse mortgage professionals can resolve to improve in 2016, however: situational awareness and action with the seniors with whom you interact.

Here’s a potent example:

Just before the holidays I watched an elderly man attempt to refill his prescription — at the meat counter in our local market. The young butcher explained that he needed to go to the pharmacy, about a mile away. I was concerned that a) the man was obviously confused and b) it was much too far for him to walk, especially in the dark. The deli worker told me not to worry. “We know him; he comes in here all the time. This is only the second time he’s asked about his medication, though,” he said, amused. When I reiterated that I was worried about him walking all the way to the pharmacy, and possibly getting lost or tired, the deli worker replied, “Oh, he has a car.”

What’s wrong with this picture? This is precisely the type of scenario where timely intervention can be crucial. While the gentleman in question may still be OK to drive, and only a little disoriented on occasion, what I witnessed could signal the beginning of a mental decline, or be a clue to some underlying health issue, or “simply” mixing up his medications — and is a red flag for a medical check-up and family awareness.

How can loan officers become more attuned to such health and safety issues?

  • When you make a home visit, look for telltale signs of a senior who may need help: uneaten food on the table, or prescription bottles scattered across the counter. The reverse mortgage professional may be the point person, perhaps even before a family member, who may gloss over what they see because they’re not ready to admit their loved one needs help — or because they visit so often, they’re accustomed to the disarray.It’s easy to become desensitized to what’s around us. I once insisted I smelled gas at a friend’s house where I was a frequent visitor. Finally, to humor me, he called the gas company, clarifying that although he didn’t think he had any leaks, his friend did. The next time I stopped by, to my amazement he said, “I’m a believer!” The gas technician found and fixed leaks in both the stove and wall heater. My friend didn’t suffer any ill effects, but imagine if this had been an elderly person, and the gas had been leaking for months or even years…
  • Take appropriate action. On a home visit, one loan officer noticed that the smoke alarm was “chirping”. The reverse mortgage client dismissed it casually, saying, “Oh, it’s been like that for months!” The savvy LO took it upon himself to go to the nearest hardware store, buy fresh batteries, come back to the client’s home and install them. Such small steps can make all the difference between someone being able to remain at home, or needing to go into assisted living — or perhaps being misdiagnosed with early-stage dementia when the truth is, they’ve been unknowingly breathing toxic fumes for months!
  • Communicate with discretion. If you’re already in communication with family members who are actively involved with your client’s care, it’s probably a good idea to gently mention what you’ve discovered. If this would be inappropriate, you can be a silent Samaritan — and make an extra effort to ensure this client or prospect is receiving the care and assistance they need.

With a resolution like this, you’ll not only be able to keep it, but will also improve the lives of the seniors you serve. Happy New Year!


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